“And There Was Evening”: Why Your Day Should Start at Night

“And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day.”
— Genesis 1:5

We usually think a day starts when we open our eyes in the morning.

But the Bible paints a different picture. In Genesis, each new day begins not with sunrise, but with sunset.

At first glance, this might seem like just an ancient way of marking time. But modern science suggests there’s something deeper going on here. In fact, the idea that your day begins at night may be one of the most biologically accurate and mentally healthy perspectives you can adopt.

Sleep as the Real Beginning

Your body runs on a 24-hour internal clock called the circadian rhythm. As the sun goes down, your brain naturally starts producing melatonin, a hormone that prepares you for sleep.

In other words:
Your day doesn’t begin when you wake up.
It begins when you start winding down.

Think of it like building a house: sleep is the foundation. Without a strong base, no matter how beautiful the structure, it won’t stand. Likewise, without quality rest, your productivity, mood, focus, and immune function are already compromised before the day even starts.

Here’s a striking fact:

Just one night of poor sleep can reduce cognitive performance by up to 40%—more than the effect of being legally drunk.

We don’t wait to pour the concrete after the house is up. So why do we treat sleep as an afterthought?

Science Says: Better Nights = Better Days

This isn’t just philosophy. It’s backed by science.

According to the National Sleep Foundation, people who follow a consistent bedtime routine and begin winding down 60–90 minutes before sleep report:

• More restful sleep
• Improved mood the next day
• Greater focus and productivity at work or school

A 2021 study from Harvard Medical School found that people who practiced intentional pre-sleep habits, like turning off screens early, dimming lights, and engaging in relaxing activities, showed up to 30% better cognitive performance the next morning compared to those with irregular or screen-heavy nights.

Even more striking:

The performance difference between a well-rested brain and a sleep-deprived one can exceed the cognitive decline caused by alcohol.

In other words, starting your day tired is like starting your workday drunk. That’s how foundational sleep really is.

And sleep quality doesn’t start when your head hits the pillow.
It starts with how you treat the hours before bed.

By intentionally winding down at night, rather than crashing into sleep, you’re not ending your day.

You’re building tomorrow’s success.

Ancient Time vs. Industrial Time

In today’s world, time is built around productivity.
Wake up → Work → Rest.

But in ancient Jewish tradition, a new day began at sunset:
Rest → Rise → Work.

This wasn’t just cultural. It was human.

We are designed to recharge before we perform.

Imagine redesigning your day like this:

• Evening: Wind down and unplug
• Night: Deep, restorative sleep
• Morning: Wake with clarity
• Daytime: Create, work, produce

Seen this way, tomorrow begins tonight, not just spiritually, but biologically.

Try This: A 3-Day Sleep Reset

Here’s a micro-action challenge:

🕰️ Set a wind-down alarm 90 minutes before bed
💡 Dim the lights, reduce screen time, and do one calming activity
📝 Write down one intention for tomorrow—then forget about it until morning

Try this for just 3 nights. You might be surprised how your mornings begin to transform—not because you did more, but because you rested better.

---

Final Thought

The ancient words, “And there was evening, and there was morning…”, weren’t just poetic.

They hold a truth we’re rediscovering today:

Your day doesn’t start when you wake up. It begins when you lie down.

Start your day with rest because recovery isn’t the reward.
It’s the beginning.

🔑 Key Expressions & Idioms with Examples

1. On the way

• Meaning: A location or stop that lies along the route to another destination.
• Use: To show convenience or justify a detour.
• Examples:
  • “I can pick up your package—it’s on the way to work.”
  • “There’s a gas station on the way to the lake.”

2. Out of the way

• Meaning: Not conveniently located; requires a detour.
• Use: Indicates something is distant or inconvenient to reach.
• Examples:
  • “That diner is completely out of the way—I’d have to backtrack 15 minutes.”
  • “The hotel is a bit out of the way, but it’s peaceful.”

3. Go out of your way (for someone)

• Meaning: Make a special effort; do something inconvenient to help someone.
• Use: Often used when expressing gratitude or offering reassurance.
• Examples:
  • “Thanks for going out of your way to help me move.”
  • “You don’t have to go out of your way—I’ll manage.”

4. Remote

• Meaning: Far from populated areas or conveniences.
• Use: Describes locations that are isolated or hard to reach.
• Examples:
  • “They moved to a remote cabin in the mountains.”
  • “That apartment’s too remote—no public transport nearby.”

5. Nearby

• Meaning: Close in distance; not far away.
• Use: Points out convenience or closeness.
• Examples:
  • “There’s a pharmacy nearby if you need anything.”
  • “Is there a good restaurant nearby?”

6. En route / On route

• Meaning: Currently on the way to a destination.
• Use: Often used to update someone on your location.
• Examples:
  • “I’m en route—should be there in 10 minutes.”
  • “Just left, I’m on route now.”

7. In the way / Get out of the way

• Meaning: Physically blocking a path or creating an obstacle.
• Use: Literal or metaphorical blockage.
• Examples:
  • “Move your car—it’s in the way.”
  • “He stepped aside to get out of the way.”

---

🎭 Role Play Script from the Episode

Scenario: Michelle is driving to Lindsay’s house and calls her for help with directions.

---

Michelle: I’m so sorry, Lindsay. I know I’m super out of the way.

Lindsay: It’s totally fine! It’s actually on the way to my physical therapist, so not too bad.

Michelle: Most people say it’s a bit remote.

Lindsay: It’s not really nearby, but it’s not too far. So, at the corner, turn left, not right.

Michelle: Oh, okay! I’m on route.

---

🧩 Paragraph Using All Expressions

When I told Jake I needed a ride to a job interview, he didn’t hesitate. He went out of his way to help, even though the office was completely out of the way. I appreciated it, especially since his route was already tight. Thankfully, there was a gas station on the way where we could grab coffee. The company’s office was a bit remote, nestled in an industrial park, and not exactly nearby to anything familiar. As we pulled up, a delivery truck was in the way, so Jake had to ask the driver to get out of the way so I could get out. I texted the recruiter, “I’m en route—just a few minutes away!” What a morning!

What I learned from “The Birth of Taste” and building my personal archive

---

1. Can you really say you like something?

“What do you like?”

It sounds like a simple question, but for a long time, I struggled to answer it.

Not because I didn’t have interests, but because I wasn’t sure if what I liked was truly mine.
Was it something I genuinely loved, or just something I picked up because everyone else seemed to love it?

That’s when I came across The Birth of Taste by Tom Vanderbilt.
This book didn’t just ask why we like certain things. It helped me realize how deeply our preferences are shaped by exposure, culture, and experience.
And most importantly, how we can take ownership of them.

---

2. Did I really choose the things I like?

One of the most striking lines in the book is this:
“We cannot like what we have not experienced.”

So many of our choices are influenced quietly and constantly.
What’s trending on Instagram, what the algorithm feeds us, what influencers recommend, or even what our friends admire.

I started to wonder

“Was I genuinely choosing these things?
Or was I being nudged, over and over again, to like what I was told I should?”

That question changed everything.
I decided to take back control and start building my own taste.

---

3. So I began creating a personal archive

I gave myself a small monthly budget to experiment.
I started testing my taste, on purpose.

• Trying different brands of candles
• Exploring T-shirt fabrics and cuts
• Comparing colors, textures, and even coffee beans
• Buying things not because I needed them, but to see how I felt about them

And then, I started documenting.

• What I liked and why
• What felt off
• Would I buy this again?
• In what context did it feel meaningful?

These notes weren’t just product reviews.
They became a map of my preferences
A reflection of who I was becoming.

---

4. Taste builds slowly, like identity

Vanderbilt writes
“Taste isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build.”

That line stuck with me.

People often talk about taste like it’s natural
“I’ve always liked this kind of thing.”
But most of what we like is a result of what we’ve been exposed to
And when we take the time to experiment, reflect, and archive
We stop being passive consumers
We become curators of ourselves.

---

5. From hobby to identity to future

My little archive isn’t just a fun side project
It’s also a quiet investment in my future.

I hope one day these records of what I loved
Turn into something more.

• A curated online shop
• A blog or newsletter
• A lifestyle brand built from real experience

It’s not about becoming famous or making money
It’s about imagining a life where what I love and what I do are the same thing

This archive is not just about taste
It’s about autonomy
About choosing how I want to live, now and later

---

6. Learning to like things more intentionally

I still feel like I am learning how to like things,
but now I ask myself better questions.

Does this feel like me?
Why did it catch my attention?
Would I actually miss it if it disappeared?

When I reflect like this, my taste becomes less about what is trendy or popular,
and more about what truly resonates with me.

It helps me move from simply following others to creating something of my own.
I stop being just a consumer and start becoming a creator.

---

7. You can start building your archive today

Here is a simple way to begin:
This week, try one new thing.
It could be something you buy, taste, wear, or use.

Then write down one sentence about how it made you feel.
It doesn’t have to be profound or perfect. Just honest.

That small act becomes your first archive entry.
From there, you build — one choice, one reflection at a time.

Because taste is not something we are born with.
It is something we consciously build.

3-Step Strategy for Socializing in English

This strategy helps you prepare for small talk and social conversations at work, networking events, or conferences — so you can connect naturally and confidently.

---

Step 1: Open Your Brain Box (Mental Preparation)

Purpose: Get mentally ready for the social situation by thinking ahead.

Ask yourself:

• Where will I be? → Visualize the space: a conference room? a dinner?
• Who will be there? → Think about what you already know about them.
• What topics usually come up? → Business? Hobbies? Recent events?
• What do I know or not know about them? → Prepare questions or things to bring up.

Example:
“Jennifer mentioned she loves skiing — maybe I’ll ask when she started or where she went last.”

Why it matters:
It prevents your mind from going blank and helps you feel calm and ready.

---

Step 2: Plan How to Start the Conversation

Purpose: Avoid awkwardness by preparing an opener.

Write or think about:

• Who you’ll talk to.
• What your opening line will be.
• Possible questions to follow up with.

Example Role Play:
You: “Hey Jennifer, how’s it going?”
You: “I remember you said you love skiing. How long have you been doing it?”

Pro Tip: Remembering something someone said earlier helps you stand out and makes the other person feel valued.

---

Step 3: Be an Active Listener

Purpose: Make the other person feel heard and build genuine connection.

• Don’t focus on what you’ll say next — just listen.
• Let their response guide your next question.
• Respond naturally, like a real conversation — not a script.

Example:
If Jennifer says, “I started skiing as a kid,”
→ You ask: “Who taught you? Was it your family?”
→ Or: “Where did you usually go skiing?”

Key Phrase:
Connection, not perfection — Don’t worry about being perfect. Focus on being present and showing interest.

Refined Daily Expressions & Idioms

1. A fresh start
   • Meaning: A new beginning; an opportunity to start over without being influenced by past mistakes.
   • Example: “Moving to a new city felt like a fresh start.”
2. Hit the ground running(implied in “when January 1 hits” and setting goals immediately)
   • Meaning: To begin a task or project with enthusiasm and energy.
   • Example: “As soon as I got the job, I hit the ground running with new initiatives.”
3. Reach out and grab (an opportunity)
   • Meaning: To take initiative to seize an opportunity.
   • Example: “This promotion is your chance to shine—reach out and grab it!”
4. Go above and beyond
   • Meaning: To exceed expectations or do more than required.
   • Example: “She went above and beyond to help me settle into the team.”
5. Stand out remarkably
   • Meaning: To be noticeably exceptional among a group.
   • Example: “His ideas stood out remarkably in the meeting.”
6. Freedom of mind
   • Meaning: Mental ease and flexibility to respond naturally or creatively.
   • Example: “Once I stopped worrying about grammar, I felt a freedom of mind when speaking.”
7. Give yourself a leg up
   • Meaning: Gain an advantage or head start in a situation.
   • Example: “Rehearsing small talk before the event really gave me a leg up.”
8. On the fly
   • Meaning: Spontaneously or without preplanning.
   • Example: “He’s good at coming up with responses on the fly.”
9. Your mind goes blank
   • Meaning: To forget everything suddenly, usually due to nerves.
   • Example: “When I got on stage, my mind went completely blank.”
10. Connection, not perfection

• Meaning: A mindset focused on engaging with others over being flawless.
• Example: “Don’t worry about mistakes—aim for connection, not perfection.”

---

🎭 Role Play Script

Context: At a business networking event.

Characters:

• You – A professional preparing to connect.
• Jennifer – A colleague you’ve met before who enjoys skiing.

---

You: Hey Jennifer, how’s it going?
Jennifer: Pretty good, just got back from a weekend trip.
You: Oh nice! I remember you told me you love to ski. Did you get to hit the slopes?
Jennifer: Yes! Went up to Aspen—snow was perfect.
You: That sounds amazing. When did you start skiing?
Jennifer: Since I was a kid, my dad taught me.
You: That’s awesome. Do you still ski with your family?

---

🧠 Paragraph Using All Expressions

As the new year rolled in, I saw it as a fresh start and wanted to hit the ground running—especially at work. I knew there were chances to grow if I just reached out and grabbed the opportunity. So before the networking event, I prepared. I reviewed who’d be there and noted things like how Jennifer loves to ski. Remembering details like that can help you go above and beyond in a conversation and stand out remarkably. With this prep, I felt a certain freedom of mind—ready to connect and adjust on the fly if needed. That way, even if my mind went blank, I had a plan. I reminded myself that it’s about connection, not perfection. This simple prep gave me a leg up and made the whole experience much more rewarding.

Q1: What does “hit the ground running” mean?

A:
It means to start something immediately and with a lot of energy or focus, especially a project or task. You’re ready to go from the moment it begins.

🗣 Example:
“When I started my new job, I hit the ground running and finished two reports in the first week.”

Similar expressions:

• Dive right in
• Get off to a fast start
• Be up and running quickly
• Jump right into it

---

Q2: What does “take the initiative” mean?

A:
It means to do something before others do it, or without being told. It’s about being proactive and stepping up to lead or start something.

Example:
“She took the initiative to welcome the new team members.”

Tip:
It’s not just “starting” — it’s about taking leadership or ownership without being asked.

Similar expressions:

• Step up
• Be proactive
• Make the first move
• Lead the way

---

Q3: What does “rolled in” mean when talking about time (like “the new year rolled in”)?

A:
“Rolled in” means that something arrived or began smoothly and gradually, like time passing. When we say “the new year rolled in,” we mean the new year started or came in naturally.

Example:
“As the new year rolled in, I started reflecting on my goals.”

Similar expressions:

• The new year began
• The year kicked off
• Midnight struck

---

Q4: What does “stand out remarkably” mean?

A:
It means to be very noticeable or impressive, especially compared to others. “Remarkably” adds intensity — you stand out in a big way.

Example:
“Her creativity stood out remarkably during the team project.”

Similar expressions:

• Shine
• Be exceptional
• Outshine others
• Be head and shoulders above

Why Division of Labor and Bureaucracy Are Losing Power in the Age of AI

A New Way to Work Without Managers or Departments

---

A Model Appeared in an Ad She Didn’t Film

A model appeared in a commercial she never filmed.
How? Only her facial data was used — the rest of the video was created by AI.

A startup founder who couldn’t understand an English contract simply uploaded it to ChatGPT.
Within seconds, the AI found seven problematic clauses and even drafted a revision letter.

Middle schoolers are using AI to write assignments. College students are thanking ChatGPT at graduation. Office workers are getting help writing reports.

So here’s the question:

Why was the way we worked so complicated in the first place?

---

Why Did We Create Division of Labor and Bureaucracy?

In the 18th century, Adam Smith changed the world.
His big idea was simple.

“If people divide tasks, they can produce more, faster.”

So one person cuts, another bends, another wraps.
That was the start of the division of labor.
It boosted productivity, and industrial capitalism thrived.

But problems emerged.
More people meant someone had to manage. Mistakes needed control.

That’s when bureaucracy came in.

German sociologist Max Weber structured this new system —
reporting lines, approval chains, performance reviews.

All of this was meant to run large organizations safely.

Division of labor brought efficiency.
Bureaucracy brought order.

---

Why Are These Systems Falling Apart Now?

The world has changed.

AI doesn’t divide work into smaller parts. It integrates.
AI puts fragmented tasks back in the hands of a single person.

Work that used to require multiple teams
can now be done by one person using AI tools.

• Planning, producing, and publishing an ad
• Reviewing contracts and drafting responses
• Designing, composing, coding, and sharing globally

Even managers are no longer essential.
AI gives feedback, analyzes performance, and fixes mistakes.

We are returning to the age of artisans
but this time, we’re equipped with powerful tools.

Bureaucracy once existed to manage inefficiency.
But inefficiency itself is now being removed.

---

A World Where Everyone Can Be a Creator

In the past, creating something required a team.
Now, anyone can build, launch, and grow — alone.

You can design your own product
Sell it online
Create music or content
Distribute it globally
And build a fanbase — all on your own.

It’s a return to the artisan mindset
But this time, it’s different.

Traditional artisans relied on their hands.
Today’s artisans are powered by AI.

---

So How Should We Live Now?

The idea of landing a “safe job at a big company” is no longer the only path.
Things are shifting fast, and AI is not replacing us — it’s freeing us.

• Do work you want, not just what you must
• Use tools, not titles
• Be a creator — because today, anyone can
• But only those who start will see results

---

Final Thoughts

The age of division and control is ending.
Two hundred and fifty years after Adam Smith, we’re entering a new era
Where individuals can own the full process again.

Managers are disappearing. Departments are shrinking.
But the power of the individual is growing.

Technology doesn’t replace humans.
It expands what we can do.

You have the tools.
You have the opportunity.
Now it’s your turn to become the artisan.
And your time starts today.

Refined Daily Expressions

1. Take (someone) in

Meaning 1: To give someone shelter, usually in difficult situations

• “They couldn’t find a host for the exchange student, so my neighbor took her in.”
• “It was nice of them to offer to take us in.”

Why it’s useful: It carries empathy and is often used when someone needs help or support, which is very useful in emotionally sensitive conversations.

---

2. Take in (an event/place)

Meaning 2: To attend or experience something

• “We could take in a movie tonight if you’re up for it.”
• “We took in a Broadway show on our trip to New York.”

Why it’s useful: A more elegant, slightly vintage way of saying “go to” that sounds well-read and culturally aware.

---

3. Take in (clothing)

Meaning 3: To alter clothing to make it smaller

• “That dress would need to be taken in at the waist.”
• “I had to get my wedding dress taken in.”

Why it’s useful: Handy when talking about fitting clothes, it can replace the simple “alter” or “resize” in more casual yet specific contexts.

---

4. Get taken in

Meaning 4: To be fooled or deceived

• “The scalper managed to take in several tourists with his fake tickets.”
• “Do you think I got taken in spending $20 on this mug?”

Why it’s useful: Adds subtlety when talking about being deceived without sounding accusatory—especially in professional or polite conversations.

---

5. Take it all in

Meaning 5: To absorb or fully comprehend a situation or environment

• “I’m trying to take it all in—there’s so much to see.”
• “After the shocking news, he needed a moment to take it in.”

✅ Why it’s useful: Expresses emotional or mental processing—great for deep or reflective conversations.

---

Bonus Alternatives

• “Soak it in” / “Drink it in” – Same as “take it in” but more poetic.
  • “We need three days in Rome to soak it all in.”

---

Role Play Script from the Episode

Scenario: Two college students are backpacking across Europe.

---

Aubrey:
Yeah. This city is amazing. I’m trying to take it all in. There’s so much to see. It’s difficult to know where to head first. And I don’t want to just see the sights. I’d love to take in a play or a concert tonight.

Lindsay:
Absolutely. Hey, do you think I got taken in spending $20 on this souvenir mug?

Aubrey:
No, I think that was a steal. Okay, good. I almost bought that dress, but I could tell it had to be taken in at the waist. I’m glad we didn’t stay with my aunt. It was nice of them to offer to take us in, but I wouldn’t want to disturb them when we get in late.

---

Practice Paragraph Using All Expressions

While traveling through Italy, I felt overwhelmed trying to take it all in—the architecture, the smells, the sheer energy of the streets. One night, we decided to take in a local opera, something I’d never done before. It was magical. I almost bought a gorgeous vintage dress at a market, but it clearly needed to be taken in at the waist, and I wasn’t about to splurge on tailoring abroad. Speaking of splurging, I wondered if I’d gotten taken in when I paid €25 for a hand-painted espresso cup, but the artist seemed genuine. That night, our hostel was overbooked, and a kind local couple offered to take us in. Their warmth reminded me that travel isn’t just about seeing things. It’s about connecting with people.

Q&A Vocabulary Review

Q1. What is a scalper, and what do they usually sell?
A1. A scalper is someone who buys tickets for events and resells them at a higher price, often illegally or dishonestly.

---

Q2. How do you pronounce the word “waist” and what does it mean?
A2. It’s pronounced /weɪst/ (rhymes with “taste”). It refers to the narrow part of your body between your chest and hips, or the part of clothing that fits that area.

---

Q3. What does subtlety mean, and how is it pronounced?
A3. Pronounced /ˈsʌt.əl.ti/ (the “b” is silent), subtlety means being indirect, delicate, or not obvious—often used in communication or actions.

---

Q4. What does it mean if someone was deceived? And how do you pronounce it?
A4. It’s pronounced /dɪˈsiːvd/. To be deceived means someone tricked or misled you into believing something false.

---

Q5. What does the word accusatory mean in tone or behavior?
A5. Accusatory means expressing blame or suggesting someone did something wrong. It’s often used to describe a voice, look, or tone.

---

Q6. What does the phrase sheer energy describe?
A6. It describes pure, intense energy—a strong feeling of liveliness or enthusiasm.

---

Q7. What does the sentence “I wasn’t about to splurge on tailoring abroad” mean?
A7. It means: “I had no intention of spending a lot of money on altering clothes while traveling overseas.”

The Three Powers That Make Us Truly Human

What I Learned from Takashi Saito’s The Conditions of Humanity

“We are all born human, but few of us live as true members of humanity.”

---

I didn’t expect a book to challenge my way of living so deeply.
Takashi Saito’s The Conditions of Humanity wasn’t just insightful.
It made me pause. It made me ask:

Am I really living as a human being — or just existing?

The book outlines three key powers that define someone who doesn’t just go through life passively, but actively becomes part of humanity in its truest sense.
And then, in the final chapter, it quietly introduces a fourth condition — the one that makes all the difference.

---

1. The Power to Summarize

“What matters most is the ability to recognize what matters most.” – Takashi Saito

We live in a world drowning in content.
But how much of it do we truly understand?

Saito’s words hit hard:
“Only those who can summarize truly understand.”

I realized how often I consume information without digesting it.
Now, after reading something — even just a podcast or article — I try to write one short summary.
It helps me slow down and own what I just learned.

---

2. The Power to Steal (Learn)

“To steal knowledge, you must first empty your own wallet.” – Takashi Saito

This part really challenged my ego.

The idea of “stealing knowledge” isn’t about copying.
It’s about being open enough to learn deeply from others.

But that requires humility.
I had to admit that I often listen with one ear while preparing my reply with the other.
Since reading this chapter, I’ve been trying to show up with an empty wallet — letting go of my assumptions to absorb more fully.

---

3. The Power to Push Forward

“The one who summarizes, steals, and pushes forward — that’s a true human.” – Takashi Saito

We all have ideas. But what separates dreamers from doers?

Execution.

I found myself nodding when Saito emphasized “compressed, focused effort.”
I’ve spent too long thinking things over and over.
Now, I try to act faster — even if it’s just taking one small step.

Starting is scary. But it builds momentum.

---

4. The Hidden Condition: Becoming a Master

The final chapter of the book felt different.
It wasn’t practical advice — it was philosophical, reflective.

Here’s what I took away.

Solitude

Some answers only come when the noise is gone.
I’ve started setting aside quiet time. Not to be productive — just to be present.

Immersion

This line stuck with me:

“Immersion creates real skill.”

Not 10,000 hours. But deep, undistracted practice.
I’ve started timing myself for 25-minute “deep dives.” Even a few of these a week changed how I feel about focus.

Expansion

Learning isn’t collecting facts.
It’s connecting them — turning knowledge into insight.
Now, I try to link what I read with what I live.

Direction

No one is going to tell me what to learn next.
That’s my job. And I’m finally taking ownership of it.

---

What I’m Doing Differently Now

Since reading this book, here’s what I’ve started doing:

• Summarizing one idea I learn each day — in my own words
• Setting quiet time to think, without my phone
• Taking small actions on ideas instead of waiting for the “perfect time”
• Documenting what I learn — even if no one reads it

These small things add up. They’ve already shifted how I show up to each day.

---

Practice This Today

• Write down one sentence that resonated with you today
• Listen more deeply to someone, without preparing your reply
• Take one small action on something you’ve been putting off

---

Quotes That Stayed With Me

“Only those who can summarize truly understand.”
“To steal knowledge, you must first empty your own wallet.”
“Immersion creates real skill.”

---

Final Thought

This book isn’t just about knowledge.
It’s about becoming someone who lives with intention, who learns deeply, and who pushes forward with clarity.

It reminded me that humanity isn’t a given. It’s a choice.

And every day, through small steps, we get to make that choice again.

And more importantly — it belongs in your practice.

🎯 Refined Daily Expressions and Idioms

1. Raw emotions

Meaning: Intense, unfiltered feelings; very sensitive or painful emotions.
Example:

• “My emotions were really raw after watching that movie.”
• “Everything’s too raw right now, I’ll call her next week.”

2. Ugly crying

Meaning: Crying uncontrollably and without concern for appearance.
Example:

• “I watched Into the Wild and ended up ugly crying for 20 minutes.”

3. Put a little space between

Meaning: Allow time to pass after a difficult event before engaging again.
Example:

• “It’s still too raw, so I want to put a little space between now and when I reach out.”

4. Have a sense of timing

Meaning: Be sensitive or intuitive about when to do or say something.
Example:

• “Are you good at having a sense of timing when someone’s grieving?”

5. Bald / Bawled (cry)

Meaning: Cry loudly and emotionally.
Example:

• “We both bawled after watching that movie.”

6. People are mysteries

Meaning: Human behavior and emotions are unpredictable.
Example:

• “Sometimes you don’t know why you cry — people are mysteries.”

---

🎭 Role Play Script from the Podcast

Context: Two friends cooking together, catching up, and discussing a sensitive situation.

---

A: Careful with that chicken. I think it’s still a little raw.
B: Oh, okay, thanks!
A: So, did you talk to Ruth?
B: No, not yet. I think the whole situation is still a little raw, so I’m going to wait a few more days.
A: That makes sense. I saw the raw email you sent me of what happened. Yikes.
B: Yeah… Hold on, I need some chapstick. My lips are so raw this time of year.
A: Oh, mine too!

---

📝 Paragraph Using All the Expressions

After watching Wicked for Good, I found myself ugly crying in the theater — my emotions were just so raw. It caught me off guard because I didn’t expect to react that way. Later, I wrote a raw email to my friend, trying to process it all, but honestly, I think I need to put a little space between now and when we talk. Everything is too raw, and I don’t want to say the wrong thing — I’m trying to have a sense of timing. Sometimes I wonder why certain moments hit me harder than others… I guess people are mysteries. Oh, and to top it off, the cold weather left my lips completely raw. It’s been a day!

Q&A

---

Q1: Can “everything” be the subject in “Everything’s too raw right now”? Shouldn’t the subject be a person since it’s about emotions?

A: Yes, “everything” can absolutely be the subject.
In this sentence, “everything” refers to the overall situation or emotional environment, not a person. Native speakers often use abstract nouns like everything, the situation, or the moment when talking about emotional sensitivity. It doesn’t need to be a person.

---

Q2: In “I think it’s still a little raw,” is “raw” referring to chicken being undercooked or something else?

A: In that context, yes — it refers to undercooked chicken.
Example: “Careful with that chicken. I think it’s still a little raw.”
Here, “raw” means “not fully cooked yet.”
In other contexts, “raw” could describe emotions, wounds, or skin.

---

Q3: How do you pronounce “grieving”?

A: It’s pronounced: /ˈɡriː.vɪŋ/ — “GREE-ving”
Two syllables. The stress is on the first syllable.
It means to feel deep sorrow, especially due to loss.

---

Q4: How do you pronounce “bawled”?

A: It’s pronounced: /bɔːld/ — “bawled”
Same pronunciation as “bald” (no hair).
It means to cry loudly and uncontrollably.

Example: “She bawled her eyes out after the movie.”

---

Q5: Is “Yikes” an expression of joy?

A: No, it’s not.
“Yikes” expresses surprise, shock, fear, awkwardness, or discomfort — not joy.

Examples:

• “Yikes, that looks expensive.”
• “Yikes! I forgot to call her back.”

It’s similar to saying “Uh-oh” or “Oh no,” not “Yay.”

---

Q6: What does “It caught me off guard” mean?

A: It means “It surprised me unexpectedly” or “It happened when I wasn’t prepared.”
Often used when something emotionally or situationally surprising happens.

Example: “That question caught me off guard.”
It suggests emotional vulnerability or a lack of readiness.

---

Q7: What does “To top it off” mean?

A: It means “in addition to everything else,” usually to emphasize a final (often negative) detail.

Examples:

• Negative: “It rained, I forgot my umbrella, and to top it off, I lost my phone.”
• Positive: “The dinner was amazing, and to top it off, they gave us free dessert.”

It can express frustration or emphasize something extra.

---

Q8: In “She’s grieving the loss of her father,” is “the loss of her father” the object of “grieving”? Can we say just “She’s grieving”?

A: Yes, “the loss of her father” is the object of “grieving.”
But “She’s grieving” is also a complete and natural sentence. You can use it without the object if the context is clear or if you want to speak more generally.

Adding the object simply gives clarity about what the grief is about.

Why Pain Might Be the Key to Real Happiness

Reflections from The Happiness Hypothesis by Jonathan Haidt

“Pain and pleasure are two sides of the same coin. Without pain, pleasure loses its meaning.
Real happiness is found not in comfort, but in the ability to keep going through daily hardship.”

These are not just poetic words. They point to something deeply true about human nature.
Psychologist Jonathan Haidt explores this very idea in his book The Happiness Hypothesis, where he connects ancient wisdom with modern psychology to uncover where happiness really comes from.

One of the most powerful insights in the book comes from Chapter 7, titled The Uses of Adversity. It shows how pain, when properly understood and processed, can actually help us grow and lead more meaningful lives.

---

Pain Is Not Always the Enemy

We often try to avoid pain. But Haidt challenges that instinct. He presents what he calls the Adversity Hypothesis:
People need adversity and struggle to develop strength, wisdom, and real happiness.

However, not all pain helps us grow. Pain must be handled, reflected on, and integrated into our life story. Haidt emphasizes that growth only happens when pain is processed well.

So how do we “digest” pain properly?

---

How to Process Pain in a Healthy Way

Here are three practices that help turn pain into growth:

1. Find meaning in the pain
Ask yourself: “What is this pain teaching me?”
Rather than trying to escape it, look for the message behind it.

2. Talk about it and connect
Sharing your pain with a friend, a journal, or a therapist can make it more manageable.
When pain is put into words, it loses some of its weight and gains clarity.

3. Give it time
Not all pain makes sense right away. Some things can only be understood later.
Allow yourself the space and time to feel and heal.

As Haidt says, “Growth comes not despite adversity, but because of it.”

---

The Problem with Pleasure: It Always Wants More

You also said something very true:

“Pleasure always wants more pleasure. But such pleasure either doesn’t exist or is hard to maintain.”

This is supported by psychological research. Our brains quickly adapt to good things.
This is called the hedonic treadmill. The more we chase pleasure, the faster it fades. We end up needing more and more to feel the same level of joy.

Pleasure gives short highs, but not lasting fulfillment.

---

Real Happiness Comes from Daily Effort

While pleasure fades, there is a different kind of happiness that grows.
It comes from doing difficult things, repeatedly, even when it’s hard.

This is what you described perfectly:

“Daily happiness comes from repeating hard tasks and finding achievement in the process.”

Haidt agrees. True happiness is built slowly.
It comes from:

• Doing meaningful work
• Overcoming discomfort
• Seeing progress through effort

This kind of happiness builds confidence, stability, and inner peace.
Not from chasing new pleasures, but from staying committed to small, valuable routines.

---

Pain and Pleasure, Growth and Discipline

Pain and pleasure are deeply connected.
Pleasure without struggle feels empty. Pain, when faced with courage, creates depth.

Repetition, discipline, and effort may not feel thrilling. But they give us something better than excitement.
They give us satisfaction.

Pain does not disappear, but if you endure and reflect, it transforms into meaning.
Pleasure is fleeting. Achievement is lasting.

---

Final Thought

Haidt writes:

“The most rewarding life experiences often come after the most difficult challenges.”

When we stop running from discomfort and start working through it, we begin to grow.
And in that growth, we find something better than pleasure.

We find peace.